Patience and the Pigskin

National Public Radio is doing a series on high school football culture.

Rather than get into what this culture does to those of us who don’t want to be part of it, here’s a tip for those of you who are being dragged to pep rallies against your will.  It’s easy, it’s simple and it works.

When you’re forced to leave your classes to go to the gymnasium to whoop up the team, simply gather in one of the upper corners of the bleachers and quietly read or do your homework. It won’t be long before the people who like games will complain that you are quashing their vibe.

Since the administration can’t force you to stand up and cheer, when approached simply ask for a separate study hall, with a monitor. After one or two times, when they discover that all you do is read and study when you’re in the study hall anyway, the monitor will head back to the rally where he or she wants to be anyway.

Then you can bring out the chess and ouija boards and have arcane debates and art and dance contests.



2 thoughts on “Patience and the Pigskin

  1. I staged a mutiny when I played the oboe in high school. We were all supposed to march in the football band and I flatly refused, pointing out you can’t march with a doube-reed instrument. They said I would be given a triangle or bell to play. I told them I wasn’t interested in percussion instruments and that I simply would not have anything to do with it and preferred to use that time to practice the instrument my parents were paying a private teacher for me to learn. They had to give in.

  2. Wow, I’m surprised. You must be a great oboe player. Most band directors would rather cut off a hand than give up on letting someone out of marching band.

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