Okay, here is a very very very simple rule in life:
Don’t tease the cat.
If you don’t get bitten or scratched by the cat, ask yourself the question my mother always asked me:
“What were you doing to the cat?”
If you come to my door and push my buttons until you hit a sore spot — and you do it on purpose — do not — DO NOT — be all surprised and worried when I blow up and in the kindest way possible take your face off.
Do this stuff in public, okay? So we can both look like idiots.