You’ll HURT yourself!

Okay, this is another of those warnings I keep trying to give people.  You know — the ones that if you don’t listen, then you’re going to have to put up with me pointing at you — doink doink doink — and saying “I told you so!”

IF I’m working as a clerk at Al’s Mini Mart (where I fill in when somebody’s on vacation, or sick or whatever, because I run my own business and live right down the road and I can usually chip in pretty darned quick) — do not come in and pull stupid scams on me!

Yeah, I’m new there, and I only fill in occasionally, and I do dumb things like can’t figure out the change or punch the $100.00 button or whatever — but don’t use my inattention to pull crap.  You will only get yourself in more hot water once I’ve figured out what you’ve done.

I have a choice.  This is YOUR ass, over there.  This is MY ass, over here (it’s not great, but let’s not get to comparing; I don’t like to see grown people cry).  Which one do you think I’m going to drop into the hot water?

For example:  do NOT mess with the credit card documents!  If you don’t like the way the receipt you have to sign prints out your CC number, don’t wait until I’m busy dealing with a half dozen customers and use the opportunity to scribble out most of the numbers, while complaining as though the store is doing something wrong, or has control over the receipts printout in the first place. 

I am, of course, going to note on the receipt that you scribbled these numbers out.  I am going to call the store the next day and get store policy on it. 

At which point, I find out that store policy is that you don’t get to use your credit card there any more, not if you’re going to abuse the privilege by scribbling on the paperwork with anything except your legal signature.

Look, silly person, those are DOCUMENTS.  You don’t get to alter them!  And considering what your husband does for a living you should know better.  I don’t know if it was your card or his — or if he was your boyfriend — because, again, things were awfully busy and 99 people out of 100 down there act like decent honest adults and don’t pull CC scams on me, and I get spoiled. 

Fine.  I have store policy now.  So I don’t have to accept your credit card.  So now the whole store and the boss knows, and if you can’t use your credit card at the store, don’t come whining to me about the bad things I did to you.  I’m not the one made you do a stupid thing like this, for whatever stupid reason you did it. Didn’t your guy that was with you there — witnessing what you did — considering what his job is, TELL you it’s dumb and probably illegal?

Or didn’t he know?  And if not, maybe he needs some refresher courses .  I don’t want him to lose his job, so maybe he better get on top of this right now before it runs past him again.

Like I said, I’m not covering my ass for yours.  I was in the army — and I CYA.

People, use your heads!  Otherwise, you’ll HURT yourselves!


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